on the brink of an adventure!

this is my last night in Jackson for a couple weeks (just over 2, unless something strange happens), and i gotta say…

this is the part where i wig out.

the reality of the impending adventure hit me like a semi truck monday night.

by tuesday night, my pulse and respiratory rate were consistently elevated.

by tonight (wednesday), stress hit peak levels and my entire body responded much like you'd expect it to after being hit by a semi truck.

for the past two weeks so many people have been almost daily passing on their prayers and blessings and excitement to me and i am rather humbled. 

and now i am humbly begging for more.  (after the Summary of my Day/background story to the prayer requests and praise :) )

today has been one heck of a day. mistake #1 was thinking i could wake up before noon and somehow be okay.  soooo not true. we started off alright, but it definitely took me 4 tries to leave the house with all 5 things i needed to bring with me.  like the car keys, for one.

1615 is when the migraine happened.

1705 is when the migraine skipped a stage and went straight to the puking.  i haven't puked in 4 1/2 years.  but a brief psychoanalysis of myself and the immediate after-effects proved it was stress-migraine related and not contagious or requiring me to flee the premises.

1735 is when the Cubbies showed up.

just in case i die of malaria overseas, i love that i have tonight as a memory.  and that my stomach somehow retained the double-dose of Excedrin so that i could be there to HAVE this memory ;)

the lesson i was able to teach centered on Christ as our shepherd- the one who guides, provides, and protects His sheep, every single one of them, no matter where they wander off to.  and it was preceded by a simple, humble, touching prayer led by another co-leader but participated in by a whole herd of little Cubbies.  Cubbies who grasp even just a bit, but who eagerly try to grasp more, ask questions before and during story time or even snack time, and blow my mind with their simple faith every week.  sometimes i wonder if i have as much faith as they do or if i've buried some of it.  after game time, when the game teacher usually has them shout out the Cubbies' "motto" ("Jesus loves me!") he told them to sing it instead- just to see what happened.  at least half of them caught on and sang a rousing-yet-totally-uncoordinated rendition including the chorus.  

my pulse was still high as i walked out the building and is only climbing.

i'm putting this post on this blog for a couple reasons, one of them being that as technologically challenged as i am, there are continuing difficulties in getting the other blog to post onto facebook or twitter or the internet.   (however, i'd prefer that this blog be kept completely separate from twitter if at all possible, so if you don't mind, don't tweet this out to everyone you know-just keep it to facebook.  that'd be awesome.)

i am full of praise:

-i have some wonderful 4 year olds. i friggin' love them. i learn so much by teaching them, and also seeing the progress of last year's Cubbies who against my instructions insisted on growing older and moving up to the Sparks class, and can now write words and read and… it's crazy.

Tra and LaLa started as just a way to connect these little minds to missions, and now they connect me to these kids as well- as well as connect me to many other people, young and old that i can share Jesus with.

-they have some wonderful parents/family members, who are my church family members. i friggin' love them, too.  from the very beginning of this journey a whole whopping 5-6 weeks ago, they and many others have supported this endeavor in multiple ways, always above and beyond anything i have needed or asked for or thought of.

-i have a wonderful opportunity to share with other people that they have a Good Shepherd who loves them more than they can imagine. 

-i have a Good Shepherd who knows His sheep and finds them when they go astray and brings them back to the fold, no matter how broken, scared and crazy-lost they've gotten themselves.

i am also full of freaked-out-ness:

-i have a pile of emotional baggage that i have been fighting with for what seems like years (mostly because it's been… years :P ). another suitcase got thrown on top of the pile this week. and it's definitely over Delta's 50 pound weight-limit.

-i have a couple of friends going through incredible amounts of pain.  i can do nothing for them.  it is not my story to tell, but it is weighing on me heavily and i need all kinds of prayers send their way.  the Holy Spirit knows their address and will forward it on, if you wouldn't mind sending a message of hope and healing.

-i have… zero boldness and confidence right now.  it may be my stomach and nerves talking, but boldness and confidence are what i desire.  maybe an extra dose of faith.  i think faith is a large part of the difference between "boldness and confidence" and "stupidity and recklessness."

-i have 2 50-ish pound suitcases filled with donated toothbrushes, tums and tylenol, wound care supplies, vitamins and cough drops.  our group of 30-something people is about to encounter thousands of people in thousands of situations- every one of them needs their Good Shepherd.  and our team needs to be willing to follow the Shepherd, trusting that He will lead us to exactly the right places and people in exactly the right time, no matter how crazy or not-our-plan-ish it looks.  the Type A part of me is struggling quite a bit with this :P

this trip will be good. it will have eternal effects. and i am ridiculously excited to see what is in store for us!  i think once i am on the plane the twitching and tachycardia will stop, too (or at least back off a bit). 

as long as i have WiFi access, i plan on keeping people stateside updated using this WordPress blog:

golalago.wordpress.com

and figuring out how to make it more accessible to all those who want to stay up-to-date on things- so feel free to share it, re-post it, tag or hashtag it, or reply/message me if the links fail like they did last week :P  my phone's got Viber, which i also have little experience with but if you text me during LifeGroup time/mornings, chances are pretty good i'll be able to reply ;)

until i see you again and can share in more detail about this trip, my prayers for you are largely modeled after Philippians (in particular chapter 1, except for the imprisonment part ;) ) and Ephesians 3:14-21. 

thank you.

God bless you.

ready.

set.

go!