12.5

so i've been working in this new unit for almost 2 months.

i love it- i really do.  i transferred because this new position offered everything i'd miss about my first unit (doing what i love, with people i love, on the night shift which is when i love... everything... much better), as well as several new opportunities to learn things and gain skills, experience stuff i'd never otherwise experience.  when an opportunity like this lands in my lap, i like to take them.  so i did.  it's been a blast.

...and then last weekend happened.  good glory- what a weekend. in some ways, it was just a another shift (and then another and another and then yet one more), but in other ways it was ridiculous.  it took "ridiculous" to a whole new level, really.  the only reason i said i would work the fourth shift was because the third one was so bad i didn't want to end the weekend on such a sucky note.

that third consecutive shift, i left so fast i didn't take the time to rip the dumb face mask and shoe covers off.  i needed fresh air, a shower, a moment to think and another moment to get rid of just a couple tears that had been begging for release for many hours but never had the chance because i practically hadn't blinked for 14 hours.

but my head was held high. 

and i came up with an idea for a new tv show (because clearly we don't have enough tv shows).

it's called "12.5" and it stars a nursing unit (because no nurse ever works alone).  it's non-stop action, because the only time we pause to chart, breathe and eat is after the shift is supposed to be over.

we don't walk. ever.  we run- just like Jack Bauer. only difference is that he gets bathroom breaks during commercials.

now, we don't shoot our coworkers in the head with guns but we do shoot epi and curasurf and some juiced-up saline.

what we're up against: not international terrorists, but diseases we can't cure, non-viable statistics and red tape out the wazoo.  no airborne biotoxins, but invisible electrolytes that insist on being out of whack.

trade out the two-faced spies for some crazy…. just straight-up crazy visitors or family members.

sha-bam- you've got your next blockbuster.  

Dear Jack Bauer,

you're awesome. you really are. aside from a dirty mouth, you're a model patriot, what every citizen should strive to be like.

you've saved thousands and thousands of innocent Americans multiple times.  you kept your cool under impossible circumstances and you kept your eyes on the finish line when anyone else with a normal human body would have been dead waaaaay before then.  you based every decision not on what you wanted, but what would accomplish the purpose and save as many lives as possible.

You're welcome.

you may be a tv star- a downright hero, even.

just want to say though, that you only saved a bajillion people because someone else saved them first.  if you took a poll of all those you rescued, and then removed every single one of them that had ever had a heart attack or a stroke or was born prematurely or had a nuchal cord.  take away all the uncontrolled diabetics.  the asthmatics. those who were choking on their food or straight-up coded in a restaurant nearby someone who was CPR-certified. those who've survived car crashes and cancer. every single one of those lived because there was a team of nurses and doctors, surgeons and caretakers  and normal humans who were there before you were.

for that matter, what about those students who only made it through high school because there was that one teacher who motivated them to do their best and push through? 

what about those kids who grew up and became successful parents and employees and Americans because their own 2 parents were there?

what about those who  didn't have those parents, but had someone else?

all those owe their lives to God who put the right people at the right time for them. 

you do, too, because quite frankly, your CPR sucks and you have no knowledge of physiology. none. 

but America, myself included, thanks you and freakin' loves your show.

Love,

the whole nation that's waiting for the next season

yes, there are shows about nurses.  about as accurate as Bigfoot, but whatever.  i really don't think an accurate tv show about nursing would go over very well with the general public.  too messy.  by gum, did we ever make a mess this weekend!  me and my preceptor both are a little OCD-neat with the wires and tubes and we follow all the rules we possibly can, but when a life is on the line, it's time to screw the protocol and do what it takes.  do it now-whatever "it" is- and worry about permission later. you can sweep up the piles of trash later. you can chart the whole mess afterwards and make it look as neat as you want. 

just make sure all those notes you wrote on the wrappers, gloves and paper towels aren't in the trash you swept up. 

it ain't pretty.  it ain't easy. but i love it.

and if the national anthem sounded forth, i would  stand without shame right next to Jack Bauer and sing with as much gusto as anyone else who is proud of their job and the work that they do. hopefully both of us get a shower and hairbrush before it's screened live, but if not it'll be okay.  i mean, it's real life after all!