i love the (few, and
far between) moments where various unrelated areas of my life align and
correspond in ways i can't explain, but that leave little gems of truth
sprinkled around like a giant Holy Spiritual sneeze. it's just the greatest thing ever, running
around and snatching them up, savoring them and chasing off to the next. i wish it happened more often.
as often happens
after tuesdays, i woke up today and found another wednesday in progress. which
also means that it was time to brace myself against the oncoming tidal wave of
Cubby-ness. as per usual, i made my way into
the upstairs room at church a couple hours early in order to gather, prepare, photocopy and set up
everything needed to engage 18 small people for 2 hours. of course, this also included at least one
prayer. i'm not quite vain enough to
assume that any good coming out of that time in AWANA is because of me. i've
also benefited this past month from hearing multiple sermons from 3 different
churches in 3 different states about prayer, that is to be a central goal this
year in these churches. it's like the SBC has this big conspiracy to get us all
to pray or something… huh. i hope it's working. i'll say it's got me jump-started, at least.
but also happening
the past month-ish or so, we've been spending our Cubby story time learning
about the beginnings of the Hebrew people, from Abraham to crossing the Red Sea
and how God is big and strong enough to keep ALL of His promises ALL the time. this has led to not only multiple rousing
renditions of "My God is So Big" but also a fair number of hysterical
quotes and questions from the inquisitive little minds. for our last story time before Christmas break i
was blessed with the task of explaining the ten plagues. i know, i'm still
feeling guilty about it. ("Merry Christmas- look, this girl is covered in
boils!") the good news is that i was also able to include the positive part of
the story- the very first Passover, and the reason why one of Jesus's nicknames
is the "Lamb of God." even despite the trauma and total grossness,
God's plan for deliverance can be seen throughout. not only that, but also His holiness, His
grace, His bigness and His power. the
Old Testament is chock full of some pretty huge promises that only a big,
powerful and loving God could keep. that magnificent display called Passover
was only the beginning.
this week, outside
the Cubby's story material, i wound up reading the story of the last Passover- or at least, the last one
Christians celebrate. today it was
Mark's account, which includes some heart-wrenching details that get me every
time. i was struck this afternoon by the
hint of irony that only Jesus would gotten at the time, when the disciples
asked Him where He'd like them to prepare the Passover meal. the very same
night that the passover lamb would be killed, the perfect Passover Lamb stood
outside the city gates, looking a bit over to the side, where a little hill
called Golgotha made a bump by the side of the road, knowing that He would be
arrested in a matter of hours. Peter and
John ran off to prepare the meal, and Jesus was spent His last free day with
the other disciples, knowing that everything was already in place.
once that seder meal
was over and Jesus and the remaining 11 friends were in the Gard of Gethsemane,
we read a prayer that i can't think right now of having heard many sermons
on. i've heard a lot about the Lord's Prayer,
how to pray, why to pray, what happens when we pray, and the prayers of all
kinds of people throughout the Bible… but not many about this one. or at least the part i noticed this time. it's one of the few "unanswered"
prayers in Scripture. and by
"unanswered" i mean it in the same way others do, which is really
"not answered in the way i want it to be."
right there, in the
Bible, Jesus (who by this point is in the middle of a full-blown anxiety
attack) prays, "Father…make this go away. please don't make me do
this." of course, this is all said in perfect faith, and He also says,
"Your will be done- if there's no other way, then Your will be
done." but that cup did not go
away. there was no other way. if anyone's prayer wasn't going to be answered immediately in the affirmative, who'd guess it would be His? and yet just like with Moses, God had the perfect plan for our deliverance- and it involved the sacrifice of the Lamb.
i've got a few
"unanswered" prayers of my own that i took downstairs to my usual
place, and made another wet spot on the carpet in front of the altar. i know
the prayers of so many biblical characters often seemed to be ignored for long,
even when they seemed to be God-honoring or fulfilling promises He'd made. Abraham waited decades… DECADES… for some of
God's words to come true. the Hebrews
were in Egypt for 400 YEARS before they were freed- you know they'd been
praying for at least 395 of those for deliverance, yet before the first
Passover generations of slaves had prayed and cried, lived and died, asking God
why they were being 'passed over' and ignored. Job, Elijah, David, Hannah,
Zachariah, Paul… and even Jesus. they
all prayed, for healing or strength or deliverance or children or hope or
faith.
so what do we
do? we pray anyway. we pray knowing that
every promise will be kept and that the prayers of the faithful are never
passed over. they may not be answered in the way we think or hope, but if not,
it's only because God's answer is even bigger and better and more beautiful
than we knew to think or hope for. in my
tiny, clean, Type A world, i've got answers to my prayers that seem to be all
kinds of wonderful and God-glorifying.
but if i pray like Jesus and always, always make His will the ultimate
aim, then i can be pretty sure of 2 things: first, that prayer will be
answered. and secondly, it probs won't
be what my tiny, but clean, world has room for.
and that's okay. (it doesn't feel like it, but it is). the Passover Lamb has everything prepared for
us; He's got every answer- He IS every answer, and we have Him interceding for
us even now, guaranteeing those answers.
i'm not sure how
much of the hugeness of Passover sunk in to those 4 year old brains, but maybe
someday i'll be surprised- it's happened before. everyone but Jesus tends to underestimate a
kid's ability to hear, understand and trust what's going on, which is utterly
amazing when you factor in all the pinching, laughing, poking, shoe-untying,
hairband adjusting, crying and bathroom visiting that they are also able to
accomplish at the same time. somehow,
God makes Himself known to them- and us.
now if only i can
pull off "My God is So Great" like a Cubby, i'll be set.
